Selfish.

My thoughts about this post started yesterday when my parents and I were packing up my apartment. I realized just how ridiculous my attachment to my "things" is. I was going through my clothes with my mom and deciding which clothes would go to their house, which clothes would stay and be packed in the storage unit, and which clothes would go with me to Haiti. Yes, I have that many clothes. 

Realize, I am going for three months. I need quite a bit of clothes. I began to realize how great my "need" was when I had my clothes bag almost completely full and still felt like I "needed" to take more clothes. This is a large duffel from Vera Bradley. Ladies, you know how huge those things are. I FILLED it with clothes that I "needed". 

I kind of pushed it down and allowed myself to feel okay because I would be donating most of those clothes to the hospital, until this morning. Lisa, a woman in my church, and her daughter came up to me to offer some help moving, encouragement, and donations. Lisa's daughter, Dooey, wanted to give up some of her stuffed animals for the kids in Haiti. Everyone had stuffed animals as children, I'm assuming. You know what a big deal it is for a child to offer those to others. I was amazed. 

Then, as the Lord would have it, my Pastor, Jermaine, brought up The Beatitudes during his sermon. In Matthew 5, we find some promises from God. Verse 8 really got me. "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God." This reminded me of Dooey and her willingness to give to the less fortunate. 

Moral of this blog, I'm not sure. I just wanted to share my thoughts. Please be praying for Dooey, the children her stuffed animals will touch, and my, sometimes, selfish thoughts. 

Preparations.

In just 3 short weeks, I will be on my way to Port-Au-Prince, Haiti. I feel, in some small way, that the sum of everything in my life has led me to this point. In the coming weeks, I will be leaving my job in Connecticut, moving out of my apartment, and beginning a 3 month mission trip in Haiti. It feels weird to say that. Upon my return, God and I will be "figuring things out". For those of you who know me, that is not my personality in the least. A leap of Faith is what some may call this, at times it feels more like a cliff.
 
But God...

• Gave me this great passion to serve those less fortunate than myself
• Gave me great nursing experience to prepare me for anything
• Gave me an opportunity to combine those two things in to one great adventure for Christ

 
It hasn't been all rainbows and sunshine. There has been a lot of sacrifice. A lot of pruning. I look to scripture for times when I feel like all of this may be too much. Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others." Philippians 2:3-4
 

My mom brought this song yesterday and I thought I'd share it with you. Thanks for your support and prayer in this endeavor and forgive me if this feels disjointed, I'm not a pro at this blog thing. =)